bad day at work

[Retic chic]

If you think YOU'RE having a bad day at the office, this will put
things in perspective! This is even funnier when you realize it's
real! Next time you have a bad day at work...think of this guy.

Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in
Louisiana. He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling
rigs. Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to
radio station 103.2 on FM dial in Ft. Wayne, Indiana, who was
sponsoring a worst job experience contest. Needless to say, she
won.



Hi Sue,

Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I
had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately
at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you
realize it's not so bad after all. Before I can tell you what
happened to me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of
my job. As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I
wear a suit to the office. It's a wetsuit.

This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep
warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater.
This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It
heats it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to the
diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose. Now
this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times
with no complaints.

What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the
hose and stuff it down the back of my wetsuit. This floods my whole
suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi.

Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to
itch. So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse.
Within a few seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out
from my back, but the damage was done. In agony, I realized what
had happened.

The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into
my suit.

Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't
stick to it. However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate.
When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually
grinding the
jellyfish into the crack of my butt.

I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator.
His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with
five other divers, were all laughing hysterically. Needless to say
I aborted the dive.

I was instructed to make three agonizing in-water decompression
stops totaling thirty-five minutes before I could reach the surface
to begin my chamber dry decompression. When I arrived at the
surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet.

As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter
running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub
it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put the
fire out, but I couldn't poop for two days because my butt was
swollen shut.

So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much
worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt.

Now repeat to yourself, "I love my job, I love my job, I love my
job."