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02-06-05, 08:42 PM
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#46
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Member
Join Date: Oct-2004
Location: F-Town, Ontario
Age: 45
Posts: 73
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A couple of my favorites
" Im fat and your ugly, but at least I can diet" - (I'm actually not fat, so no offence yo the fat or the ugly)
" If I wanted to hear from an a$$hole, I'd fart"
" If I wanted your opinion I'd give it to you"
Ryan
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02-06-05, 08:49 PM
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#47
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Member
Join Date: Jan-2004
Location: Red Deer, AB
Age: 42
Posts: 100
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You'll never be the man your mother was!
You will be winged by an anti-aircraft battery.
Q: What's tan and black and looks great on a lawyer?
A: A doberman.
While you recently had your problems on the run, they've regrouped and
are making another attack.
You attempt things that you do not even plan because of your extreme stupidity.
Q: What's hard going in and soft and sticky coming out?
A: Chewing gum.
You will be attacked by a beast who has the body of a wolf, the tail of
a lion, and the face of Donald Duck.
Last edited by Senator Gracken; 02-06-05 at 08:53 PM..
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02-06-05, 08:55 PM
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#48
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Member
Join Date: Oct-2004
Location: F-Town, Ontario
Age: 45
Posts: 73
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More...
" There is no "I" in TEAM, but there's "ME" though"
"The best part of you ended up as a stain on the sheet"
Pick up line - "Do you sleep on your stomach/"
she say's - "No"
- "Can I?"
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02-07-05, 12:51 AM
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#49
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Member
Join Date: Mar-2004
Location: Niagara
Age: 61
Posts: 34
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Why do they call it " Tourist Season"
When we are not allowed to shoot them?
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02-07-05, 11:51 PM
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#50
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Member
Join Date: Jun-2004
Location: London
Age: 46
Posts: 736
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"If your parents got a divorce, would they still be cousins?"
(sorry, no offence to inbreds!)
__________________
1.4 Surinam(e) Bcc, 7.17 Ball Pythons, 2.6 Solomon Island Ground Boas, 2.2 Cornsnakes, 1.1 Colombian Bci, 1.2 Veiled Chameleons, 0.1 Uroplatus Sikorae, & lots of other creatures!!!
"Nevermind tomorrow, I'm not promised today"-innocent bystander :medtoothy
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02-08-05, 12:14 PM
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#51
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Member
Join Date: Feb-2004
Location: Edmonton
Age: 46
Posts: 842
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On a bumper sticker:
Stop the inbreeding, Ban country music
From Kevin Spencer:
I can lose weight, you can't lose the stupid.
__________________
Nita Hamilton
BALL PYTHONS!!
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03-01-05, 04:08 PM
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#52
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Member
Join Date: Jul-2002
Location: Ontario
Age: 51
Posts: 788
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best 1 liner ever...
"hold my beer while I kiss your girlfriend"
Best Licence plate,
WAS HIS
Best house sign,
No dog, snake ate him!
BEWARE.
__________________
"Only through education do we teach the ignorant that which we love is not evil but wonderous"....
~Kim~
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03-02-05, 09:08 AM
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#53
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Member
Join Date: Feb-2005
Location: ohio
Age: 40
Posts: 117
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THis one came from when me and my dad had THE TALK This is all he said to me. I'll never forget this.
Do you know what happens when a condom breaks. (then he pointed at me)
I obviously missed the point though. now i get to reuse that line in the future.
__________________
If I were two faced why would I wear this one.-Abraham Lincoln
You can't spell slaughter without laughter
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03-02-05, 09:28 AM
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#54
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Member
Join Date: Jan-2005
Location: near Saskatoon, SK
Posts: 61
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Worst pick up line ever - I actually had this one tried on me:
Your daddy must have been one heck of a farmer... 'cause you sure have nice melons!
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03-02-05, 10:06 AM
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#55
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Member
Join Date: Feb-2005
Location: Ottawa
Age: 50
Posts: 33
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This is a cheesy one liner I like to use. It usually gets a good laugh from my buddies when I bust this one out.
Its more of a response to something any chick that says this to you, and I garantee that at least one chick will proclaim this of herself, you just have to remember and watch out for it.
Any chick that proclaims that she is trouble, you immediatly follow up with, "That's all right, I always liked to get 'into' trouble".
And if she's not a morron, she'll catch on.
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03-03-05, 12:55 PM
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#56
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Member
Join Date: Aug-2004
Posts: 231
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"My tapeworm tells me what to do."
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03-03-05, 01:11 PM
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#57
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Member
Join Date: Jul-2002
Location: Ontario
Age: 51
Posts: 788
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Quote:
Originally posted by Slipknot
"My tapeworm tells me what to do."
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LMFAO!!!!
Nice
__________________
"Only through education do we teach the ignorant that which we love is not evil but wonderous"....
~Kim~
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03-03-05, 01:28 PM
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#58
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Member
Join Date: Feb-2005
Location: ohio
Age: 40
Posts: 117
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"I like to cuddle. But there's just such a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so they cant get away."
" The jesus of cool" - ( I have a hat that says that"
" I just installed a skylight. My upstairs neighbors are furious."
" I'm bulemic... You can read minds."
__________________
If I were two faced why would I wear this one.-Abraham Lincoln
You can't spell slaughter without laughter
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03-03-05, 01:37 PM
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#59
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Member
Join Date: Aug-2004
Posts: 231
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Quote:
Originally posted by Sunrunner
LMFAO!!!!
Nice
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I thought someone would like that. 
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03-04-05, 05:34 AM
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#60
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Member
Join Date: Feb-2005
Location: dorset UK
Posts: 71
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"If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight."
AND
"Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, 'Where have I gone wrong?' Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one night.' "
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