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11-28-02, 01:24 PM
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#1
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Member
Join Date: Jul-2002
Location: Ontario Cda
Posts: 3,234
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Dr. Seuss does Star Trek TNG
If Dr. Seuss wrote for Star Trek: the Next Generation...
<pre>
Picard: Sigma Indri, that's the star,
So, Data, please, how far? How far?
Data: Our ship can get there very fast
But still the trip will last and last
We'll have two days til we arrive
But can the Indrans there survive?
Picard: LaForge, please give us factor nine.
LaForge: But, sir, the engines are offline!
Picard: Offline! But why? I want to go!
Please make it so, please make it so!
Riker: But sir, if Geordi says we can't,
We can't, we mustn't, and we shan't,
The danger here is far too great!
Picard: But surely we must not be late!
Troi: I'm sensing anger and great ire.
Computer: Alert! Alert! The ship's on fire!
Picard: The ship's on fire? How could this be?
Who lit the fire?
Riker: Not me.
Worf: Not me.
Picard: Computer, how long til we die?
Computer: Eight minutes left to say goodbye.
Data: May I suggest a course to take?
We could, I think, quite safely make
Extinguishers from tractor beams
And stop the fire, or so it seems...
Geordi: Hurray! Hurray! You've saved the day!
Again I say, Hurray! Hurray!
Picard: Mr. Data, thank you much.
You've saved our lives, our ship, and such.
Troi: We still must save the Indran planet --
Data: Which (by the way) is made of granite...
Picard: Enough, you android. Please desist.
We understand -- we get your gist.
But can we get our ship to go?
Please, make it so, PLEASE make it so.
Geordi: There's sabotage among the wires
And that's what started all the fires.
Riker: We have a saboteur? Oh, no!
We need to go! We need to go!
Troi: We must seek out the traitor spy
And lock him up and ask him why?
Worf: Ask him why? How sentimental.
I say give him problems dental.
Troi: Are any Romulan ships around?
Have scanners said that they've been found?
Or is it Borg or some new threat
We haven't even heard of yet?
I sense no malice in this crew.
Now what are we supposed to do?
Crusher: Captain, please, the Indrans need us.
They cry out, "Help us, clothe us, feed us!"
I can't just sit and let them die!
A doctor MUST attempt -- MUST try!
Picard: Doctor, please, we'll get there soon.
Crusher: They may be dead by Tuesday noon.
*COMMERCIAL BREAK, COMMERCIAL BREAK
HOW LONG WILL THESE DUMB ADS TAKE?*
Worf: The saboteur is in the brig.
He's very strong and very big.
I had my phaser set on stun --
A zzzip! A zzzap! Another one!
He would not budge, he would not fall,
He would not stun, no, not at all!
He changed into a stranger form
All soft and purple, round and warm.
Picard: Did you see this, Mr. Worf?
Did you see this creature morph?
Worf: I did and then I beat him fairly.
Hit him on the jaw -- quite squarely.
Riker: My commendations, Klingon friend!
Our troubles now are at an end!
Crusher: Now let's get our ship to fly
And orbit yonder Indran sky!
Picard: LaForge, please tell me we can go...?
Geordi: Yes, sir, we can.
Picard: Then make it so!
</pre>
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11-28-02, 01:36 PM
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#2
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Member
Join Date: Jul-2002
Location: Victoria, BC
Age: 44
Posts: 5,454
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LOL Dragn! Yet another person who has too much time on their hands... hehe....
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11-28-02, 03:55 PM
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#3
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Member
Join Date: Feb-2002
Location: Burnt River, Ontario
Age: 49
Posts: 225
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Are you feeling alright Hildie?? lol
__________________
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Quality Designer Leopard Geckos, Corn Snakes and more!
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11-28-02, 05:00 PM
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#4
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Member
Join Date: Jul-2002
Location: Ontario Cda
Posts: 3,234
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Oh I'm feeling great - up to the fill line with Neocitran, Tylenol #1 and coffee.... but even with all that in me, I don't think I'd be able to think up that remake of TNG. No idea who get the condolences for owning the brain that though it up - 'tweren't me - I just copy and paste.
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11-28-02, 05:28 PM
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#5
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Member
Join Date: Jun-2002
Location: Trenton
Posts: 6,075
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Lol that was hilarious
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11-28-02, 05:48 PM
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#6
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Former Moderator no longer active
Join Date: Feb-2002
Location: Christchurch
Posts: 10,251
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LOL cute!
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11-28-02, 07:11 PM
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#7
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Member
Join Date: Jul-2002
Posts: 595
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ha ha ha ha ha!!! That was funny!
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11-29-02, 06:00 AM
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#8
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Member
Join Date: Mar-2002
Location: The Forest City
Age: 55
Posts: 803
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__________________
"Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind."
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11-29-02, 07:09 AM
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#9
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Member
Join Date: May-2002
Posts: 609
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just what I needed to read this morning
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11-30-02, 07:49 AM
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#10
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Member
Join Date: Sep-2002
Posts: 2,125
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Ahh, that was fun!
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The Zombie Mama is here!
http://www.thebeardedlady.org
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11-30-02, 06:42 PM
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#11
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Site Supporter
Join Date: Oct-2002
Location: Hamilton Ontario
Age: 45
Posts: 83
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That was hillarious
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