A...love matter...

reptilesalonica · 04-27-03, 10:22 PM

What would you do if the person who you love, don't want reptiles? You see that together doin' fine, she/he is understandable and patiente but he/she don't want reptiles. What would you do?
~Greg~

NewLineReptile · 04-27-03, 10:29 PM

Kick their a$$ out LOL or you could try puting them in the spare room with a locked door so He/She is not in contact with them and if that dont work do the first idea i said ha ha

reptilesalonica · 04-27-03, 10:36 PM

LOL...but this is serious. Maybe she is the girl of my life...

shaggybill · 04-27-03, 10:41 PM

Ok....I think I can say this....

I'd rather have true love than snakes....AARRGGHHH! That was painful.

marisa · 04-27-03, 10:43 PM

If shes the true love then she wont mind the snakes, or at least put up with them

Marisa

Jeff_Favelle · 04-27-03, 10:44 PM

She doesn't have to want reptiles. Just like you don't have to want to wear ponytails and make-up (although you can if you wish). But that doesn't mean that YOU can't have them. It just means that SHE will never want to have them. That's why they have garages, sheds, guest rooms, bunkers, tree-forts, etc etc etc.

reptilesalonica · 04-27-03, 10:46 PM

It is so difficult. With animals i have been all my life. On 1996 i stuck with reptiles and i see that will remain till i get old. Reptiles is a major part of my life. I love them. I can't imagine my life without them! Even if i have all the goodys of the world i will feel empty without them

Zoe · 04-27-03, 11:00 PM

I'd say kick her out the door. I could never be with a guy who didn't like reptiles. If she'll let you keep them, that's cool, but if she wants them completely out then nuts to her. If she really wanted something she loved, would you stop her? Of course not - a relationship is a 50/50 thing, a little give and a little take. For example, you could agree to keep them only in a designated herp room.

Zoe

reptilesalonica · 04-27-03, 11:04 PM

...and here in Greece, girls that tolerate reptiles can count in the palm of 1/2 of one hand...On this i am a little jealus of your country

NewLineReptile · 04-27-03, 11:07 PM

i guess me and Zoe agree if she is the one for you and she thinks your the one for her it should not matter that you have any reptiles as long as your together and if that is not the case the feeling between you 2 cant be mutral

my wife does not like the fact that my big Burm's will get bigger because she is scared of them but she does not say nothing about getting rid of them because they make me happy and it is me that take's care of them so i think the girl of your life should feel the same and respect your feelings as well

Tim and Julie B · 04-27-03, 11:14 PM

With love comes compromise. True love has no boundaries. To love whole-heartedly means to never ask the other person to change who they are. If you choose her over reptiles, you'll always despise that, no matter how much you love her. If you choose reptiles over love, you'll always regret not holding onto true love. When Tim and I met, I had no idea what a life with reptiles would be like. I was creeped out and couldn't understand why anyone would keep them. I refused to put my hand into that stinky cricket bin to feed the reps. But then I discovered my own passion-leopard geckos. Perhaps your love interest just hasn't met the right reptile yet? Ask her to just try being around different kinds of reptiles. Maybe she will find that she actually likes some of them! Or she could compromise by just having a reptile room that she doesn't have to go into. Always remember to compromise, this is what true love should always be.
Julie B
(I love you T)

reptilesalonica · 04-27-03, 11:18 PM

I tried to get her into our herps world. We were together in the sofa and after of 2 hours conversation explaining to her all the advantages that snakes has as pets. She agree to hold my smallest Bci. After 2 minutes she makes a sudden move and the snake makes a dry bite on her...F###k!!! That was the last thing that i wanted to happened to her. Minutes later i learn that before she came into my house she cleaned her hamsters (one more reason she don't like snakes, because they eat mice)...All misfortune gathered together!?

jpaulson · 04-27-03, 11:36 PM

All joking aside, there needs to be a compromise. Lets look at this from a deeper angle, shall we? What is Love? I know it is different to everyone and each has thier own interpretation, but to me, it means to care for someone deeply, and to accept all that they were, are, and are going to be. I don't think that the issue here is how to deal with this problem--it goes much deeper.

If she TRULY loves you, then she will realize how much reptiles mean to you, and how much they are a part of your life. By taking away your reptiles, she would be taking away a part of YOU as well, and that is definitely not love! Lets say that you did get rid of them--how happy would you be? You would feel as though a part of you has died--and you would hold her responsible. That is no way to live a life, or a marriage.

With every committment, there comes a time when people have to make changes. You can only change one person in your life, and that is you. You cannot make anyone change!! My wife is not thrilled at my passion, yet she TOLERATES it because she knows how it makes me happy, and the joy I receive from them. It took a long time, but she is now comfortable with them. Point is, she loved me enough to accept that part of my life. There are things that she does and has that I do not like, but it is what makes her her, the woman I fell in love with. I wouldn't change anything for the world!!

DragnDrop · 04-28-03, 05:05 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Jeff_Favelle
But that doesn't mean that YOU can't have them. It just means that SHE will never want to have them. That's why they have garages, sheds, guest rooms, bunkers, tree-forts, etc etc etc.

But won't the neighbours wonder why she's living in a tree-fort or garage?

All kidding aside, she should realize life is full of compromises. There will be things she wants, and you won't. She'd be awfully upset if you stopped her from having whatever that is. I would think a nice compromise on species/total number/maximum size or something along those lines might work.
There is one thing I've found out - if one of you gives up something very dear to you just because the other one doesn't like it, it will become a tool of war between you two. It can and will be used as a tool when you're having a disagreement. It will always eat at you, be in the back of your mind when you see a snake you love, watch someone else with theirs etc. The feeling of resentment will be waiting in the background, waiting to explode with every little fight you will have. I hope you get it worked out to a workable solution. It's a tough decision, but it's one you can't shove aside.

Good luck, I'll cross my fingers for you.

Lisa · 04-28-03, 06:04 AM

I think she's got to realize that they are a part of your life and that sharing her life with you means they'll be around. She doesn't have to like everything you like, but she will have to accept that you like them. She has her rodents, you have your snakes.