So! I know I just joined, but I wanted to give a little advice I was given and things I know that could really help with understanding snakes as a pet! (i just read through all 21 pages to make sure i wasn't repeating too much!
You mentioned early on asking if you should find a way to keep the snake "active"
You have to realize that snakes don't need "exercise" in the way that we "need" exercise. (I'm a personal trainer, so I understand exercise!
) A snake (most snakes) will ideally sit in their hide and feel safe, maybe even for weeks or months at a time until a big tasty looking meal comes by and doesn't notice the snake. the snake will then eat that meal. For this reason, i like feeding by placing a F/T in the enclosure on the top of a sandwich-sized Rubbermaid lid (to avoid substrate getting on it) Then I can dim/shut off the lights and let the snake feel like (when it smells the mouse) has discovered some food while hiding safely in its hide.
Speaking of which, you also mentioned that you freaked the snake out a bit when you lifted its hide. A great tidbit I was told is that you shouldnt bother a snake or especially move a snakes hide while it is in it, because thats where it feels secure, you dont want your snake to be constantly thinking the hide might suddenly go away (thus stressing it out too much) if you do that a lot.
This ties into the handling thing I noticed. Think about it from the snakes perspective. You're sitting at home, watching tv and talking with someone on the phone or.. whatever, then suddenly a GIGANTIC HAND RAINS IN FROM THE SKY, RIPS YOUR ROOF OFF AND PICKS YOU OFF THE COUCH. How would you feel? Probably a little freaked out! Remember how HUGE you are compared to the snake, you are the equivalent of a tanker truck wanting to take you out and play for a while.
That said, i don't think anybody acknowledged your cat issue. I would keep your cat out of the room that your snake is in. Completely. Let's go back to my previous role-playing idea. Put yourself in your house, but its made completely of glass. Now imagine a 50 foot cat with gigantic arm-sized claws pawing at your house while you're trying to take a nap. Not very fun is it? To the snake, that is a predator that's trying to eat it, so instead of focusing on resting and waiting for the next meal, it's trying not to die a horrible claw-related death. It will also probably start to relate the smell of your cat with giant death-claws, and so the smell may start to stress the snake out as well.
Uhh other stuff..
1 big meal every other week (as people have suggested) is better, remember.. these are not mammals, they are designed to eat very large meals and then chill and digest for a while. Humans spend ~40-60 (depends on activity level and amount of lean mass) of the calories we consume PURELY to maintain our bodies at a correct temperature (it actually takes more calories to cool our bodies than it does to warm them). So imagine we didn't have to do that, we'd all be eating way less.
I would stick with an under-tank pad and go with the temp gun, instead of an over-head lamp. You're better off making it a little too cold than too hot. A little too cold, and they just wont move around as much, a little too hot and you can kill your snake. Imagine when you get a horrible flu and your temperature only raises 3 degrees, and you have a 102 fever you feel like youre cooking yourself? well 3 degrees wont be nearly as bad for a snake, but being 10-15 degrees too high can make the snake very uncomfortable.
I'm trying not to bee too ranty, but i hope those help you understand where your snake is coming from!
Last but not least...
you said "i want to hold him 24/7" - That's why people here have so many snakes!
I only recently (within the last year) got my first snake, and am working on getting another cause i need to play with snakes more haha..
Hope I helped!