Everyone PLEASE read

[Lasher]

Quick story: My wife has a very expensive sofa. Marius slipped in it one day and I could not get him out. Luckily, she was gone at the time. I whip out the knife and remove the felt from the bottom. No Marius... I start to sweat. She will be back any minute! She walks in literally as I have the hammer ready to dislocate a 2 X 4 on the bottom. She goes nuts. I mean nuts. I insist that I can't just leave Marius in the sofa and she says "It's just a damn SNAKE". I said "It would be different if you were stuck in there!" Well, she takes over and sticks her arm in the back of the sofa to rescue my "Damn Snake". .... Wait for it.... Yep, SHE GETS HER ARM STUCK!! ROTFLMAO For 15 minutes, she wiggles and wiggles and can't get un-stuck. The Lasher (I enjoy talking of myself in the 3rd person) goes and gets the hammer again, destroys the sofa, and get's the wife's arm un-stuck. She then asys " I DON"T CARE WHAT YOU DO, GET THAT DAMN SNAKE OUT OF MY COUCH". I cut a 3 inch hole in the fabric and Marius crawls out. I swear to God this is true. It was one of the funniest things that has ever happend to me... until I have to rebuild the sofa. Actual picture of one of the kids on the sofa below!