Two Alligators

[beth wallbank]

Two alligators were sitting at the side of the swamp near Ottawa.

The smaller one turned to the bigger one and said, "I can't understand how you can be so much bigger than me. We're the same age, we was the same size as kids. I just don't get it."

"Well," said the big 'gator, what you been eatin' boy?"

"Members of Parliament, same as you," replied the small 'gator. "Hmm.

Well, where do y'all catch 'em?"

"Down on the other side of the swamp near the parking lot by the Parliament Buildings."

"Same here, hmm, how do you catch 'em?"

"Well, I crawl up under one of them Lexus and wait for one to unlock the car door. Then I jump out, grab 'em by the leg, and shake the **** out of them, and eat them!"

"Ah!" says the big alligator. "I think I see your problem. You ain't gettin' any real nourishment. See, by the time you get done shakin' the **** out of a MP, there ain't nothing' left but an ******* and a briefcase."