Need to vent

[Zoe]

Sorry, but I just need to vent about this.
Okay, one of my friends, Julie, comes over to my place sometimes (i guess 3 times to date). Anyway, each time she comes, she takes out my snakes without asking me or even telling me (which, in itself bothers me, because she doesn't know how to handle them and isn't aware of where their heads are and, as a result, sometimes bumps their heads into things or let their heads fall). And each time she takes out a snake, she invariably doesn't close the cage doors correctly (or at all) and the snake escapes. It's happened at least once every time she's been here, and I believe twice every time. Up till now, all the snakes have been easy to find because they were large and found right after their escape. Or she won't close a mouse tub all the way and at 3 am I'll wake up to my cat chasing a mouse around the room then have to spend 20 minutes looking for the others that escape (I don't have the luxury of letting them go, because I live in a building that allows NO PETS whatsoever.)
But today, she handled my small female IJ (3.5' i guess) just before she left, and I left for work right away after that. I got home, and after an hour or two I went to my room (I forget why now) and couldn't see the IJ in the cage. I looked at the door, and, lo-and-behold, it was open. I started looking for her, and I looked in my closet and I saw lots of stuff was knocked over so I presume she is in there (I think I remember hearing something about 20 minutes before I found she had escaped). And my closet is a mess. The back wall is covered to the ceiling with boxes, clothes, shoes, etc etc etc. Which means I won't find her unless she comes out on her own or I take everything out of my closet, one at a time, which I am not going to do.

I hate to vent, but I am VERY irritated right now. How hard is to close a door when you've been told so many times to do it right? I never thought it was that difficult to slide the piece of glass to the wall of the cage but I guess it is.

:(

Zoe

[Lisa]

best of luck finding your ij. i'd take everything apart myself.

[chas*e]

You could get meaner snakes... that need to be hooked...lol...let her try....sorry she is a friend so tell her NO TOUCH or put a NO TOUCH sticker on the enclosures like I do...she will understand ..and get her *** to help you find the lost ones

[Lisa]

I'm thinking something slightly venomous.... she won't touch those.

[sapphire_moon]

I'd put pad locks on all cages....have her get her but over there to help, and if you can't find it. make her pay for not only the snake, but all the food it has consumed. next time she wants to handle something stand right over her shoulder and instruct her how to handle it, and when she puts it up make sure that she makes sure the door is closed and locked.
Friend or not, she don't seem to respect you, your house, or your rules very much if you have told her time and again to make sure the lid is closed.....sorry if I seemed hard, but IMO my snakes are like my "kids" if someone was puting their saftey in jeopardy then I would probably do alot worse than what I said..........

I hope you find your little IJ....

[Zoe]

No, you're not being hard, I totally agree. I should be receiving my locks soon, and I'm going to tell my friend next time I see her that she's free to handle my snakes only when I supervise everything, from taking the snake out to putting it back.

And it wasn't even a lid... I can MAYBE see how it would be SOMEHOW POSSIBLE to incorrectly close/lock a lid if it didn't fit 100% or had some weird lockign thingy that was complicated... but they are sliding glass doors! You push on them till they stop moving. NOT complicated.

I do hope I'll find her. I'm pretty sure she's in the closet, so I just have to look. Still pissed off though. >:(

Zoe

[marisa]

I would never let her touch another one of my snakes again. No one who touches any of my "property" snake, tool, clothes, whatever, and breaks it or loses it borrows anything, ever, again.

Marisa

[Dani33]

I think that you should be completely honest with her about how you feel. No one is even allowed into my herp room without my permission and supervision. I am very up front with people about that. Best of luck finding your snake. Hope you find her soon.

[RepTylE]

I must be overprotective because I would never let anyone touch my animals. My nephews like to see them up close so I hold them and totally supervise . To tell the truth, if I saw anyone opening an enclosure without my permission I would probably take their head off.

[Zoe]

yeah, its always bothered me, but i've never said anything. i told her tonight when she came on msn and she got mad and said "well ill just never hold them again!". hah. fine with me.

Sitll havent found the snake. its only been a few hours, tho.

zoe

[JD@reptiles]

lets just say the people who come into my house and leave a cage open, dont ever come back in. and i dont let many people in my house to start with.

[Pixie]

Did you say anything to her about the snakes escaping the first couple of times it happened?

I would have certainly said something after the first time! Even about picking a snake up without asking first. It's basic respect to ask first and I would be extra paranoid about someone who knew nothing about snakes!

I'm really sorry to hear about your IJ still being missing... That person would definitely not be a "friend" in my book especially from the reaction after you told her!

I think you can do without a nincompoop like that.

Pixie

[Zoe]

I told her, yes. I told her that if she couldn't close the door properly, not to take the snakes out at all.
I'm not too forthcoming when it comes to telling people what not to do because I'm worried about being overly bitchy. I got pretty mad one time, when she opened the door to my boa's cage for it to come out (she lets them crawl out so she doesnt have to reach and grab it) but when the snake put its head out, she got scared and closed the door on the snake's head. The boa wasn't hurt, but I wasn't very happy with her about that.
I've also said "why the hell are you hurting my snakes? if you cant handle them right then let me do it" when she's walked through a doorway and hit the snake's head against the wall.
I thought I acted fairly obviously about not being too happy with her acting the way she did about my snakes, but I guess she didn't care/realize. But there is no more ambiguity now, i was pretty clear. And if I don't find this snake before school on monday, i dont think i'll be talking to her anymore.

In retrospect, I waited too long to say something straight out about it, she takes SOO many liberties at my house (for example, she'll take the carton of milk and say "hey, there's not much left!" and use the rest of it. its not that big a deal, but when you rummage through people's cupboards and fridge before they are even in the kitchen themselves it tends to irritate you) but I worry that IM overreacting, you know?

Zoe

[Zoe]

Oh, and she's the type of person who thinks everything is said as a joke. If I say "you could ask first, you know" she just laughs as though i'm joking. very frustrating.

[Invictus]

Zoe, this person is someone who will take advantage of you, walk all over you, and continue to basically strip you of your own vital energy until such time as she has depleted you completely, and then she will move on to her next little victim. She has zero respect for some basic human boundaries, and has no respect whatsoever for you, your snakes, your household, or anything but her own selfish desires. Even when you confronted her on MSN about your snakes, how did she react? Like she was somehow doing you a favor by taking out your snakes, and well, now she's just not doing it anymore, dammit!

Ditch the beeotch.

[skinheaddave]

I'm with the "nobody touches my animals without supervision" crowd. There are, of course, several people I would trust completely to handle my animals. I trust them that much, though, because even though they know exactly what they are doing, they STILL ask -- every time. It is basic respect.

Cheers,
Dave

[C.m.pyrrhus]

My snake room is locked, which in itself is a good idea. You see though, I have hots and do not want someone wandering into my herp room to take a gander. No way in hell. Same should go for anyone IMO. Just better safe than sorry..........

I have had friends do some crappy things like that too, but I am anal about my stuff that I work hard for and strive to keep in good shape, so therefor I guess I make them mad. But hey, my ***** is still here too. Go figure....
Good luck on getting that IJ in your sight soon, I know how crappy the situation is.

[chas*e]

Bring her to my snake room..there are snakes that would like to get their fangs into her I am sure....like I said before tell her and if that doesn't work ..hit her..
No one touches my snakes unless I say...why should you be any different

[Pixie]

Wow, the fact that you mentionned things to her from the start makes it even worse!

She closed a door on a snake's head???!!!! I probably would have slapped her myself!!! LOL I would have had a TOTAL COW seeing that!!!

Honestly, she sounds like the worse friend or even acquaintance to have around. If someone would show me such little respect, they wouldn't have made it into my place a second time.

I'm with Invictus on this one: ditch her! I would add A.S.A.P.!!! I sure wouldn't let her into my home ever again. If you are having these problems with her at the beginning of a so called friendship, I can just imagine that it would get worse.

Definitely someone you can do without in your life, unless you like being disrespected and enjoy frustration.

Pixie

[Soul_Reaper]

Originally posted by Invictus
Ditch the beeotch.


HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Good one!

Just talk to her i guess and be strict about it, if she still fails to follow your rules then i'd go with what Invictus said...lol

[J-Man]

Originally posted by Lisa
I'm thinking something slightly venomous.... she won't touch those.

"Slightly?"

Just kidding

[lilyskip]

Seriously, if she's getting mad at you for telling her that she is ALLOWING YOUR SNAKES TO ESCAPE, then she can't be that great of a person. The fact that she hasn't apologized profusely should tell you something. You're completely within your rights to be protective of your snakes. I have a lock on Hux's tank, and Marla's is high up and large enough that people feel uncomfortable climbing on my desk and handling the unwieldy top.

Maybe next time you go to her house, take some of her stuff and hide it somewhere. heh.

[geckomom]

Originally posted by Zoe
But there is no more ambiguity now, i was pretty clear. And if I don't find this snake before school on monday, i dont think i'll be talking to her anymore.

In retrospect, I waited too long to say something straight out about it... but I worry that IM overreacting, you know?

Zoe

Zoe, glad there's no ambiguity any more, but i have the same problem with standing up to people, so i empathize w/you (altho i tend to stand up for my dog, my gex and my kids more than myself - lol).

you got it straight now, good for you - and i hope you find your baby soon...too bad some people don't realize the damage they can do with their ignorance.

[marisa]

I can't believe you even let a person like that into your home. If she has already done all these things, frankly I would have beaten the crap out of her for even thinking about giving me attitude when I asked her not to touch them. Someone who has almost hurt my snakes, lost my snakes and then treats my house like hers? LOL black eyes here we come. She would never be allowed in my home again, I wouldn't even want her on my msn.

It sucks you know people like that, I would ditch them right away. I totally agree with Invictus post.

Marisa

[TheRedDragon]

I'm with Invictus, with friends like those, you sure don't need enemies. Man, if anyone closed a door on one of our snakes' heads, I would knock the person's teeth into the back of their head.