update on my health/pregnancy *kinda graphic*

[ReneeB]

Hello everyone,

I'm only posting this as I needed to let ppl know and can't deal with writing everyone an email/pm.
[again if you need to delete it go ahead]

Please bare with me if this is a little jumbled as I'm crying horribly as I type this.


Today I got the results from the biopsy back, it's bad and they need to remove my cervix and uterus. We listened for the baby's heartbeat and it couldn't be heard, but this is a common thing before 20 weeks as the baby can still "hide" under the pubic bone and you can't hear it. As a standard thing they performed an ultrasound today and the tech was REALLY quite. She went and got a doctor to come in and he told me what I already knew. The baby's heart wasn't beating. They tried a couple of things and they couldn't get the heart to beat. So officially on Feb 27th, 2003 the baby is pronounced dead. The complication is that my body isn't "letting go" and they need to perform a complete hysterectomy on me within the next 2 weeks to remove my serverely damaged cervix and uterus, as well as our baby. I was told today that I will no longer be able to have children.

I've also made the decision to sell all of my snakes, beardies, rats, and gerbils. [see the ad I'll be posting in the classifieds in the next few days for more info]. I don't have time for them any longer and now having to deal with these issues I'm afraid they will die if left in my care.

I most likely will not be back to ssnakess.com after everything gets sold [I'll be at the april show to sell everything off if it's not sold before then].

You have been a great family for me these past months, and I've met quite a few people that I would consider friends.
Thank you Jeff and the team for giving me a place to "get away from it all" and a place that seems to care.

If you want to say anything to us please email me at renee@cyberbeach.net as I won't be around any longer. We can be reached on MSN at rbeausoleil@hotmail.com [do NOT email at this addy as we don't check it], or on ICQ 133356583 or 1760501.

Again thank you so much for listening and caring.

[sSNAKESs.com]

a true tragedy... My condolences...

[Shane Tesser]

I am sorry Renee. There is probably no words that i could put together to match the pain im sure you and Eric are going through. You will be in my thoughts, and im sure as well all of the other members as you go through this time of uncertainty. You are a tremendous friend that i charish very much and am sad to see you go through such pain. I wish you and Eric the best, and please keep in touch, you will always be welcome members here, Shane.

[asphyxia]

Dear Renee,

I am so sorry to hear that news my heart felt condolences.
Please stay in touch as you will be missed.

Respectfully
Brian

[Greg West]

My condolences

Hopefully you can stay in touch once in a while.

[Kat]

Renee,
I'm so sorry that this had to happen! I can't even imagine what you must be feeling. I'll keep in touch over msn, and you feel free to msg me if you need to talk! :)

[marisa]

I am so sorry for your loss. I know what you are going through and I hope you have plenty of support around you at home. I hope things turn up for you as soon as possible and I am truely thinking about you. Your message will be in my thoughts for many days to come.

I don't mean to get off topic, but if you get a chance to see this or read from someone else maybe I had a small idea....the choice for your animals is probably the best choice you could make right now of course but I also know that sometimes we humans can't take care of something but then become able to again once the hard times have passed...so maybe you could consider giving snakes to someone who would care for them for a undetermined time period and if you felt ready to bring them back into your life you could. That way you could feel a bit better knowing that one day if you so choose, you can at least get back a part of a hobby you have loved and enjoyed for years. Just an idea.

Again I am so sorry about whats happened in your life lately although I do not know you.

Marisa

[paul_le_snake]

im so sorry to hear ur news, i know u dont know me but if theres anything i can do let me know
paul

[PortCreditPets]

Renee be strong. We as always will offer anything to assist and help.
Grant

[Matt_K]

i think its safe to say that we are all here for you, anything you need just ask.. My thoughts go out to you and your family Renee, keep in touch!

[Vanan]

I don't think I can say anything more than what has already been said. Be strong Renee. We're here for ya.

[Vanan]

Oh, and I do agree with Marisa about not giving up your animals completely. The one thing you don't want to do is regret doing anything. My condolences Renee.

[katev17]

I, like the others, would like to send you my condolences... Such a horrible thing shouldn't happen to anybody. Keep your chin up though, because after it's over it can only go uphill from there. Good luck in the future, and I hope you'll be returning to us someday :(

Kate

[nouserpif]

I am so sorry... we will miss you..
Dan Conner

[Lisa]

I'm sorry to hear about your loss Renee, my heart goes out to you.

[Tara Garratt]

My heart breaks for you and Eric. You both will be in my prayers tonight.

Tara Garratt

[CornBall]

I am truly sorry to hear about your loss, I am sure everyone hear will miss you.

[Tim_Cranwill]

Renee, I am <b>so</b> sorry. I can't even come close to imagining what you and Eric must be going through. My thoughts are with you and your family....

[vincenzo]

i am sorry to hear about your loss . i don't know you but my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family in this time of need

[Corey Woods]

Renee,

Let me offer my deepest coldolences......I'm sorry to hear all this! Feel from to MSN me anytime.

Corey

[honduranfreekk]

Renee I am so sorry for you and Eric,s los and my prayer,s are with you both

[nuno]

My deepest condolences

[KaHane]

We are deeply sorry to hear of your tragedy, our hearts and minds goes out to you.
KaHane&Helena

[BoidKeeper]

Renee,

Words can't express how sorry we are for both you and your family. You're in our thoughts and prayers,
Trevor&Christina

[Edwin]

Renee,

After reading your post, I thought about it for a bit, and no words seem appropriate to convey my deepest condolences..

If you or Eric need help, just let me know.

Edwin

[ReneeB]

Thank you to everyone for their kind words and thoughts.
I just need to clear up something.. since I'm thinking a little bit straighter this morning.
We found out that Cassy is allergic to rodents, birds, cats, well just about everything [except dog fur oddly]. So we cannot have them in the house [no I can't feed f/t, even though all the snakes eat f/t, because my mom refuses to go into the freezer if their are dead rodents in it and she babysits the kids so she needs to go into the freezer]

As well to be quite honest and blunt, we can't afford them any longer as a funeral is not cheap, and is more important than some animals.

Again thank you for the words and prayers. We will be back on a more perm basis someday.. just not that soon.. maybe in a few weeks.. I am kinda addicted and we will still have Will's lil dwarf frog so I'll have SOMETHING to talk about :) (was told to try and stay positive and not dweal on what's happening)

[Alicewave]

My heart truly breaks for you Renee. No one should have to go through so much pain especially such awesome people like you guys. I wish you the strength to get through everything. Please come back to us when you are ready as you will be missed until then. My condolences for your loss.

[Lizzy001]

sorry for ur loss!!


WE will ALL miss u!!

[Big Mike]

Our thoughs are with you

[Dom]

I can't even beleive it .. I am so srooy Renee and Eric.. wow, i can't even imagine what u are going through ..

If you need anything Renne and Eric PLZ ask . You have me on msn and my number ..

Best of luck to you guys

xxx

[beth wallbank]

Renee.....not much for words but I wrote this for you and Erik.

My love for you has flourished
From the moment you were conceived;
You have grown from a tiny seed,
Planted in my womb.
And now, you are a small flower,
That blooms inside of me;
Your roots imbedded in my heart!
You are a part of me;
We feel, we laugh, we cry.
Sometimes when all is silent and serene,
I can feel the murmur of your tiny heart;
We are ONE.
But what kind of life would we lead together?
What could I offer you besides my love?
I'm so young, my future holds so much;
You are so new and so innocent.
What have you done to deserve this?
Please don't resent me.
I love You!
Though painful and unfair,
I have made my decision.
This is what I must do;
We can not go on.
I sense your cry; the pain you feel;
And a single tear rolls down my cheek.
Will it ever dry?
My little flower! your roots are embedded in me;
They will never let go.
When they remove you baby,
They will pull my heart out too!
(hugs)
This is written for Renee and Erik. No copying is allowed without THEIR concent.

[josefg]

I'm very sorry to hear about your loss Renee

[Rebecca]

Sorry for your lose. Although I don't know you really, I'm very sorry. I truly hope that things look up for you soon. Agian I'm very sorry for your lose.

[doenoe]

My deepest condolences. Be strong Renee and Erik.

[reverendsterlin]

My love and heart are with you luv, I hope you already knew this. You will be included in my rituals hon, healing and health will both be yours. If you need to talk or anything else hon, please be sure to write or call.
Love and hopes,
Reverend Sterling Kyle

[ETET]

Sorry for your loss, my deepest condolences.

ETET

[Leona]

Renee and family:
My deepest sympathy. The road of life can have some nasty bumps! I know I travelled the same one years ago. My heart and thought are with you. Be strong. Come back soon.
Leona
P.S. If you ever what to chat about some of the bumps, feel free to e-mail me avon_queen@hotmail.com

[RachelS.]

I can't express how sorry I am. All I can really say is I'm so sorry, and I hope you get over this hard time :(

[Jeromerules]

Wow. Terribly sorry to hear all of that. I will definitely pray for you renee. I believe everything happens for a reason. And for every heartbreak and pain in your heart I believe it can be repayed 10 fold. I will pray for you and eric although I do not know you and and I wish for the best for you two as no person on earth should go through the pain you are going through right now. God Bless Ya.
Jerome