View Full Version : Do you know why the United States is so windy?
JasonBrennan
02-08-03, 08:10 PM
Because Mexico BLOWS and Canada SUCKS!
See, I can put down my neighbor countries too;) :) :D
(for all the sensitive types, that was a joke)
KrokadilyanGuy3
02-08-03, 08:13 PM
::Stands up and applauses:: You tell 'em!
Xain
wat a coinadink my neighbours 3 year old son told me the same joke last week
JasonBrennan
02-08-03, 08:31 PM
Wow, you really zinged me there, didn't you? C'mon, where is that Canadian wit?
Just keeping them simple so the "Northern Neighbors" can keep up.
snakemann87
02-08-03, 08:36 PM
HEY IM FROM US. lol jk
asphyxia
02-08-03, 08:54 PM
^^ Say no more^^
Actually its not windy at all- it all that hot air.
Brian
Tim_Cranwill
02-08-03, 09:00 PM
BOOOOOO!!!!!:(
ok, it was pretty funny:)
Here's one for you, right out of my own book of jokes...
Q: Why does the american flag have so many stripes?
A: Because americans are a bunch of whiny little pukes!
He he... just kidding, my mom is and american, so I could have just as easily been one too:)
God bless North America;)
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING CANADIAN
1. It beats being an American.
2. Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground.
3. You can play ice hockey 12 months a year, outdoors.
4. Where else can you travel 1000 miles over fresh water in a canoe?
5. A political leader can admit to smoking pot and his/her popularity ratings will rise.
6. Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground.
7. Kill Grizzly bears with huge shotguns and cover your house in their skins.
8. Own-an-Eskimo scheme.
9. Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground.
10. It's perfectly normal to beat people up in pubs.
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING AMERICAN
1. You can have a woman president without electing her.
2. You can spell 'color' wrong and get away with it.
3. You can call Budweiser beer.
4. You can be a crook and still be president.
5. If you've got enough money you can get elected to do anything.
6. If you can breathe you can get a gun.
7. You get to be really obese.
8. You can play golf in the most hideous clothes ever made and nobody seems to care.
9. You get to call everyone you've never met "buddy".
10. You can think you're the greatest nation on earth.
RachelS.
02-08-03, 09:51 PM
LOL.... I get it ;) *thinks for a second* That's just wrong! :D
JasonBrennan
02-09-03, 01:23 AM
5. A political leader can admit to smoking pot and his/her popularity ratings will rise
And this is something you are proud of???
2. Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground.
So, since you couldn't even come up with 10 good reasons, you need this one 3 times?? Interesting....
6. If you can breathe you can get a gun.
Not quite true, legally anyways... However, I only have one thing to say about gun ownership....A man with a gun is a citizen, and man without a gun is a subject....Fear the gov't that fears it's people!! (ok, I guess that could count as two things)
10. It's perfectly normal to beat people up in pubs.
This one is pretty much the same in both places.
1. You can have a woman president without electing her.
I have to admit, this one was sadly true!!!! At least I didn't vote for the *******!!
10. You can think you're the greatest nation on earth.
We also think the sky is blue. Some things are just TRUE FACTS, even if you are color blind (I had to get the word "color" in there for you somewhere, now didn't I??)
ALL IN GOOD FUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
tightsqueeze
02-09-03, 05:45 AM
i think you forgot "Only country to successfully invade US and burn its capital to the ground."Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground."Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground."......lol i like that one
tightsqueeze
02-09-03, 05:50 AM
that reason is good enough to be written 10 times...lol its all jokes people no worries
Chio
sSNAKESs.com
02-09-03, 05:51 AM
You guys are making my laugh my pants off...good arguements..im glad my fellow Canadians, and American friends can all take a joke. Canadians are well know for being very quiet ppl in the rest of the world...we have to be...how else will we continue to plot our invasion of the U.S. :D....ah...who am i kidding..even on a good day theyre Salvation Army could kick our asses!!! :D I really dont have any jokes off the top of my head..but i do visit America quite alot, i have always enjoyed it, never had a bad time and am proud to display the Maple leaf on my backpack whenever i visit ;)
sSNAKESs.com
02-09-03, 05:53 AM
Sorry everyone..the above post was writtin by me (Shane), i guess Jeff left his log in on my computer again :D
The US salvation army is NO match for my pet beaver.(haha.. gotta love "Canadian" beer commercials)
katev17
02-09-03, 03:04 PM
LOL! Yea "Oh you're from Canada? Do you know Bob... y'know... he works in an office building?" ..... "Oh yea... Office Bob. Yea, he's dead."
Good ol' beer commercials..
Kate
lol!
I dunno, I'm pretty happy to be able to proudly wear the canadian flag on my backpack anywhere i go, and not be afraid of being shot at or taken hostage!
:]
Zoe
Weather1
03-02-03, 03:40 AM
Do not forget about our Canadian Women..
They are more Beautiful and not full of silicon..
And our beer rocks.....
Canadian beer is the best and you can drink at 18 or 19 not '21'
lol...
Found these:
1-America has Terrorist Attacks-we have hockey riots.
2-We have alot better musical bands than them - Rush, Neil Young, Our Lady Peace, Santers, The Tragicallly Hip, The Guess Who, BTO, Nickleback, Sloan, Bryan Adams, just to name a few... What do they have? Nsync??
3-When's the last time terrorists threatened Canada?
4-Half of Canada is practically unpopulated-We can blow up stuff there!
5-We have Polar Bears, which are known to acually track down and kill humans...wait...that's a bad thing....
6-Our prisons are like 5-star hotels! Breaking the law is fun!
7-Americans are fat lazy slobs...or at least that's what I've learned from American TV... I guess they are proud of it
8-Haha! America's stuck with Pauly Shore!
9-We still have our CN tower!.
10-Canadians are physically more attractive than Americans (tis true! in America, Obesity reigns!)...
11-We don't have Texas or Alabama... need I say more?
12-Give George W. a pretzel and he chokes till he passes out. Give Jean Cretien a nosey photographer, and he chokes him till he passes out.
13-Beer
14-We came up with Hockey, Baseball, Football and Basketball, four of the most played sports in the world. Not to mention Lacrosse!
15-What else did we come up with? Ice brewed beer (have I mentionned that before?) and back bacon!
16- Gun-toting slack jawed hick vs hockey player... take your pick
17-Gold
18-Oil
19-"eh" sounds a lot better than "huh", eh?
20-Um...for what its worth we um...burned down the white house.... Twice. At least, according to the history minors I've talked to!
21-Say "Wayne Gretzky," then sit back with a smile.
22-Our cities don't shut down cause of a bit of wimpy frost. Heck, we build highways out of ice in the winter.
23-Football was invented in McGill university in Montreal. First official game, McGill vs Harvard. Guess who won.
24-Superman, blindly stolen by the U.S. for their own propaganda purposes.
25-Quick, name a country that's dropped atomic bombs on real, live people! Hint: It rhymes with Bunited Strates of Bamerica.
26-We kicked your @$$ in the 100m. Ohh baby, it hurts to be this good, eh!
27-Let's put it this way: 3 Coors = 1 Canadian beer.
28-No one here likes 90210. There will never be a show named M5W 1L6
29-You tried to invade us once. Once.
30-Jim Carrey, Dave Thomas, Shania Twain, Eugene Levy, Natasha Henstridge, John Candy (used to have him), Dan Akroyd, Rich Little, Martin Short, Bryan Adams, Yasmeen, Linda Evangelista, Percy Faith? (not Sledge), The Kids in the Hall, Leslie Nielsen, "Life is a Highway" Celine Dion, Pamela Lee Anderson, Sarah McLachlan, Moist, Our Lady Peace, Chantel Kreviasuk, Alanis, Alanis, Philosopher Kings... Let's face it, if you dig music, babes or laughing, we're your country. (wow)
31-Canadian flag? We don't have to change it every time we add a province (or lose one, thank goodness)!
32-World Series. Twice. Naanee naanee boo boo!
33-The telephone, maybe you've heard of it? We invented that!
34-I've never had to go through a metal detector at school.
LOL! After reading all that, I think what we are proudest of is beer, hockey, lack of terrorism, and burning down the whitehouse!
:)
:D
Zoe
The_Omen
03-02-03, 07:51 AM
Wow!
With all the great things in canada, I want to move there now!
AND to save the canadian government some money, I can bring my own white flag!
:)
Damien Aube
03-03-03, 05:42 PM
We, here in Canada, just celebrated the anniversary of double gold medal performances in hockey, at the last Olympics.
Let me see if I can remember who and where they played???????
OHHHHHHHHHHHHH YEAHHHHHHHHHHHH
THE good ole U.S of EH!......
The most humiliating US experience since...................Vietnam!
Damien
:hammer:
canada has never lost a war. the usa has lost at least 2, 1812 and vietnam.
The US is also rapidly losing the war against terrorism.
Zoe
RachelS.
03-03-03, 07:14 PM
AHHHHHH ZOE, I'M FROM TEXAS YOU LITTLE B*ATCH!!!! scuse my French, just got a little upset there. And for your information I was adopted, heh... all I know is I'm partially French! lol... don't make fun of me... I'm moving to Canada when I get the money :D
Hey, and plus, I'm not FAT!! Hell no!... I'd rather shoot myself then get over 120 lbs, which I know I'll never be...*snickers*
Aww well Rachel dear you're the exception ;)
Move to Toronto and come see me :D
You still owe me a picture, you know.
Zoe
Yikes....rather die than be more than 120lbs? How tall are you, Rachel?
Yes The Big C is a great place but there nothing like living in the US ............we have it all, and what we dont have we just take from other countrys!
yup, you have it all, smog, a failing healthcare system, guns out of control, snipers on the highway, a government determined to go to war instead of taking care of problems within the country, a world that is out to get the usa
RachelS.
03-03-03, 10:02 PM
norman, I'm like 5'1"... anymore you'd like to know? hahahaha :D
lol okay rachel, you're allowed to be under 120 lbs ;)
Here here lisa!
anygiven60
03-03-03, 10:26 PM
Why is it ALL Canadians refer back to when they burned the White House? When in all truth the Canadians never did burn the White House, the truth is, British troops are the ones that burned the White House. You should really read up on your history alittle more... OH! and by the way, the War of 1812, was not won by either side... The Treaty of Ghent. Vietnam was just pure nonsense if you ask me. You have to admit, if Canada was to be invaded or have someone declare war on them, the Canadian military would not have the man power or the ability to defend it self. Who would Canada come crying to? Yes, yes we all know. The United States of America. It's the truth if you like it or not. Canada is secure because the US makes it that way, not because you are just the PERRRRFECT country.
Canadian troops were the forces behind a LOT of the winning battles in europe in WW1 & 2. Its not really fair to say the military doesnt have the ability to defend itself.
Anyways this thread wasnt started to say how good or bad a country was, it was just a joke, relax
Hey Rachel....just trying to make myself feel better....('Norman' is a girl occasionally-steal boyfriends screenname....) I want to make sure I woudn't be considered obese in America...
Alicewave
03-04-03, 08:15 AM
Can't we all just get along? There are great things and crappy things about both countries.
Originally posted by Lisa
yup, you have it all, smog, a failing healthcare system, guns out of control, snipers on the highway, a government determined to go to war instead of taking care of problems within the country, a world that is out to get the usa
Yep and we LOVE it.......
I love THe Big C dont get me wrong, but truthfully if the US was not your nieghbors you would have been invaded long ago...why dont anyone ever f with ya....because they know the US would not allow it.....hell our militarys work together for god sakes. My flight commander in the AirForce was a canadian.
But all in all the US is the world power, and most likely alway will, people say o look out for china they are the people we should be worried about.. My view on that is, ever since russia crumbled we have no one to sorta go to war with...do you all understand how much the cold war with russia made us money! Now that they are no longer even in the picture well we need someone else we need to create a nother world power, and guess what China would the the prime country!
No worries, this is all good fun!
Actually,at this point we feel more threatened by the U.S. than secured by it. When you guys fall, we trip over you.
Zoe
BWSmith
03-04-03, 10:03 AM
Ahhh, the only reason Canada has not been invaded is because after the freezer was invented, we didn't need that much cold storage ;)
As far as burning down the White House, we actually just wanted it remodelled and didn't feel like paying anyone to tear it down;) Come on, we have to throw you a bone every now and then.
Actually I have never been to America Jr.............. I mean Canada. But i want to know how so many of those maple leaf pennies make it all the way down to GA! I am going ot have to make a trip up north with slingshot and start pelting people over the border with them :D
I love my guns!
I love getting in arguments int he middle of the road!
I love having a 90 year old woman flip me off for cutting her off!
I love my guns!
I love the fact that the US has dangerous animals Rattlesnakes, Copeprheads, Cottonmouths, Coral Snakes, Alligators, Black Bears, Brown Bears, Grizzly Bears, Mountain Lions, Bobcats, Wolves, Sharks and Polititians.
I love that my eyeballs don't freeze when i walk outside.
I love my guns!
I love being able to buy ammo at a gas station!
I love hunting seasons for anything cute and fluffy!
I love the fact that we think we are the police of the world! Just that much more crap to blow up!
I love the fact that I can go see a doctor any time of the day or night and get an appointment with ANY of them within a week.
I love the fact that we have Deserts!
I love the fact that we have Swamps!
I love our mountains and fields!
I love the fact that Florida has more Alligators than people!
I love the pride I feel seeing the flag or a Bald Eagle!
I love the pride I feel thinking of my friends and family fighting for our country, whether they believe it is right or not, they are there!
Nanashi04
03-04-03, 10:06 AM
Originally posted by ZoeStevens
14-We came up with Hockey, Baseball, Football and Basketball, four of the most played sports in the world. Not to mention Lacrosse!
Canada sounds like a truely awesome place, but let's remember Basketball was invented in KANSAS - about an hour's drive from where I live in fact... (c'mon guys... there's nothing else worth talking about here... )
Originally posted by BWSmith
I love my guns!
I love getting in arguments int he middle of the road!
I love having a 90 year old woman flip me off for cutting her off!
I love my guns!
I love the fact that the US has dangerous animals Rattlesnakes, Copeprheads, Cottonmouths, Coral Snakes, Alligators, Black Bears, Brown Bears, Grizzly Bears, Mountain Lions, Bobcats, Wolves, Sharks and Polititians.
I love that my eyeballs don't freeze when i walk outside.
I love my guns!
I love being able to buy ammo at a gas station!
I love hunting seasons for anything cute and fluffy!
I love the fact that we think we are the police of the world! Just that much more crap to blow up!
I love the fact that I can go see a doctor any time of the day or night and get an appointment with ANY of them within a week.
I love the fact that we have Deserts!
I love the fact that we have Swamps!
I love our mountains and fields!
I love the fact that Florida has more Alligators than people!
I love the pride I feel seeing the flag or a Bald Eagle!
I love the pride I feel thinking of my friends and family fighting for our country, whether they believe it is right or not, they are there!
You said it!
Originally posted by Nanashi04
Canada sounds like a truely awesome place, but let's remember Basketball was invented in KANSAS - about an hour's drive from where I live in fact... (c'mon guys... there's nothing else worth talking about here... )
Wow you live pretty close to me!
dm101081
03-04-03, 10:19 AM
Canada is bigger, and it's on top. If this was prison, the US would be our bitch.
BWSmith
03-04-03, 10:29 AM
LMAO!
LOL......We keep canada the way it is just incase we have to spread, and we sure in the hell wont go south....so we like to keep canada looking good, after all when we get done with the US we are going to need someplace new to call home ;)
LOL!!!! GREAT ONE!!!!:medlotsae :medtoothy :mednormal :medgrimac :medfishie :medangry: :medteeths :mednormal :medcoolgu :medpirate :medbugged :medwart: :medroughn :medbigsmi
Nanashi04,
I believe that Basketball was invented by James Naismith, a Canadian and was first played in Springfield, Mass.
Ron
Anole Dude
03-05-03, 03:15 PM
Yeah i love the venemous stuff in our country i love all the other crap too. I love bears and im happy we have SOME problems cause it be weird if we were perfect. Yeah I love the U.S.A.
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